How Did I Land Here? #AdoredChaos

Adored…I am adored.  You are adored!  Did you know that?  I used to….and then I forgot.

Growing up, I was that girl that everyone loved.  You don’t know me, so please hear this, I’m not meaning to sound full of myself, it’s just how it was.  I was friends with everyone, people would praise my parents of what a great girl/tween/young woman I was (although this wasn’t often what they, my parents, experienced…).  The world was my oyster and {most} things came easy to me.

When I was 19, I didn’t think life could get any better.  I had freedom, I was smart, I had tons of friends, I knew who I was and what I was going to be—life was amazing!  Then I met a man that I was CERTAIN God had brought into my life like a knight in shining armor- white horse and all!  Somewhere in the next 5 years, I forgot it all.  I forgot I was Adored.  I forgot I was free to choose.  I forgot I was smart.  I forgot who I was going to be—and who I was.

Now, it would be unfair to blame all of that forgetting on a man.  A dear friend’s mom always says, “Other people can’t control how we feel”….but we can allow them to make us feel certain ways.  And in those years, I lost who God had made me to be—well- I thought I lost her anyway.

But in those 5 years, I also met some AMAZING women.  Women who would speak truth into my life, who would support and celebrate me down the path I was on and although states separate us, they are forever engrained in my heart today (thanks a lot to technology & FaceBook).  I also brought an AMAZING young woman into the world in those 5 years.  MyKaiLove…and the title of my 1st attempt for a blog.

Through the last decade, I’ve found myself a single mom, a dating mom, a professional mom, and entrepreneur mom, a mentor mom, a friend mom and a mom who found my way back to God and the word he had for me: Adored.  Even my name, Amanda/Mandy, means “One who must be loved/adored” Yup.  I need to be ADORED- I can’t help it, it’s in my name!

In the last decade (and it took most of that time??) I remembered that I was more than a Mom.  I was a wife again, a professional, an entrepreneur, a mentor a friend- and after a long painful journey, a New Mom!  I specifically remember God yanking the hair on the top of my head saying “I’ve been here all along, I love you”.  The chaos continued, but I started hearing his promises again.  I started seeing things differently.  What I came to realize, is that life is full of chaos, but I am Adored…and out of this journey, #AdoredChaos is born.

Today my days are filled with the chaos having a teenage girl and a toddler boy brings.  Many days are long, but the years are fast.  We laugh, we play, we cry—and every day holds at least 1 temper tantrum—sometimes mine!  The house is rarely ever clean, the dishes are never all done, I think we should only have 7 outfits each and the calendar is always full, but every day I am reminded that I am Adored—and I don’t want to be anywhere else!

I hope you choose to join my here in cyberspace, and that here you can be reminded to be the Adored Woman God created YOU to be!  Life may be chaotic for you too… but let me remind you, you are Adored among the Chaos!

3 thoughts on “How Did I Land Here? #AdoredChaos

  1. Gertie Kastens says:

    Oh Mandy, my heart is heavy and I don’t know how you are so strong to let this be your decision. You are so smart and I love you as I always have. This tears my heart up and I pray that if ever I have to be this strong that I can do it! I simply love the photo of your whole family! It is lovely! You are a true Christian whom God has been with you and still leads you! My heart aches and tears flow but I am on the outside and can do nothing but console you dear child! I love you all and always will. Grandma Gertie Kastens in Kansas!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s